The Conflict Avoidance Affair

This is the couple that seems so very nice, yet one of them will ‘go around the block and across the street’ in order not to have conflict.

In this situation it is easier for the person to handle an unfaithful situation than confront their partner.

Advice:

If you want to continue the relationship, learning how to communicate well with each other is key to recovery.

– Recovery Potential: Difficult (Depends on the couple – if they are willing to move away from being “right” and learn a new way to communicate)

– Affair Reason: Emotional connection

– Recovery Obstacles:

– The betrayed partner will not like to hear that the unfaithful partner has unmet needs, because it implies that the betrayed partner failed to do something that should have been done—and in such an efficient and predictable relationship, this is not acceptable.

– For this couple, ‘keeping face’ is important not only to the outside world, but within the relationship. These two people need to learn to be vulnerable with each other and share their true selves. Emotional attachment must be re-established.

– Working on the relationship ‘roles’ is important for this couple. Being equal is fine, but it is okay to step into your masculine or feminine role when you are together.